I still read the advice columns.
So, today I got some advice worth repeating; I wish I had received earlier. Maybe you can relate to its commonsense.
You can’t keep others from creating a scene but you can chose not to act in it ~ Carolyn Hax
I grew up in a home where creating scenes was a big deal — probably because one member always created a scene when drinking. It took me way too long to learn that they were sick, and we who were trying to . . . control their drinking . . . were sick too.
I remember the night I heard, “A changed attitude on your part, may bring about recovery.”
I could play a different part in my family’s interactions?
But, before I developed a whole new part, I had to learn that the person I loved was not weak-willed, but sick; desperately ill, emotionally, spiritually and physically. And I was becoming a mean, manipulative, judgmental jerk, who sometimes played a victim.
Of course I was totally unaware I was also mastering my own unique take on an alcoholic “start” of my own life story. But that’s a story for another time.
Right now, I simply want to offer a little hope, some good news, and a life line out of the abyss that untreated alcoholism creates.
Here’s a way to start; read The Merry-Go-Round of Denial
I coulda, shoulda, woulda done more sooner . . . but, we get the help we need when we are willing to listen. Maybe you can learn from my mistakes.
Maybe tonight you will be willing to become willing?
I swear: for too long, I did not know I had a choice in some of the crazy family dynamics. I do not have to ever play the victim, the judge, or the enforcer ever again — I can just be me; making progress.
Never miss an opportunity to make others happy, even if you have to leave them alone in order to do it. ~Author Unknown
Thanks for reading — Let me know what you think.
Love in Christ,
Sober and Grateful
PS: Here’s a wee bit more advice I have learned the hard way. You might like How to Do Something for the Addict You Love