I did not take my initial Step Nine well. I was in a hurry to get past the discomfort I felt, recognizing that my drinking harmed others. I did not ask for help from my sponsor, before I took it. Zipping through, I was not owning how much damage I did to others by the things I did and left undone. I wanted my own peace of mind – but it was at the expense of others. (The Twelve and Twelve, page 84)
Refresher: An AA member in a meeting I attend developed a way to start working the Twelve Steps with AA literature. Again, on this step, I have added my suggestions, too. Remember we are making progress – not aiming for perfection
STEP NINE: MADE DIRECT AMENDS TO SUCH PEOPLE WHEREVER POSSIBLE, EXCEPT WHEN TO DO SO WOULD INJURE THEM OR OTHERS.
- Read in the Big Book again from page 76 to 84 and study the promises on page 83 and 84.
- Go out and make your amends this week.
- Get at peace with all people in your life.
- Ask yourself “is there anyone that I would not feel comfortable with if they walked in this room right now.”
- Know that God is going with you all the time.
Words to study: Apology, Amends
DO NOT TAKE YOUR NINTH STEP like I took mine the first time! Ask for help and listen to counsel.
In some ways the little picture of steps* looks like what taking the ninth step feels like: We may not see exactly where we are going, or what we will find when we take this step. But taking it is evidence I realized my drinking was never just my business; I have become willing to take responsibility for the well-being of others, by owning what me drinking may have cost them. (See Matthew 5:23-24)
AA members suggest that:
- I have no demands or expectations of the person(s) to whom I speak.
- I am as willing to listen as I am speak.
- I will not assume other people will get what I am trying to do – or care.
- I was born sorry – never use that word again; try I was wrong when I describe what I am willing to own.
Thanks for reading – hope you working with your sponsor to make a plan – and that you will work the plan.
Love in Christ,
Sober and Grateful
*photographed in 2012 in West Virginia